Monday, November 15, 2010

Stockholm Airport, For Jackie and you...

I love people who send me correspondence in poetic form. This is because then I can write them back with a poem. Poems are definitely one of my favoritest things. You know that. Oh, this how I share things with you now, publicly. This is how I make transmission...there is always the mild frustration that I can't see you, but alas, to the poem. I wrote it in a Stockholm Airport. My plane was delayed 2 hours. I love people who send me notes in the forms of poems. You used to do that. I'm so grateful that our friends still do.

Oh, Eleni is fine,
but she's been better
ah, it will take time
to change this weather

That's what her friends say
and they are so smart
especially Jackie
whose got a big heart

Oh, Eleni is fine,
as Stockholm is little.
She waits to fine dine
on Berliner schnitzel

But the plane is delayed,
and so she's got time
to let the hours fade
and write this odd rhyme.

Oh, how is Jackie, I send her big kisses!
How much I do miss that lovely, sweet Mrs!

Schnitzel face collage found online.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Day O' The Dead

The first time I celebrated Day of the Dead was with you. We went to Mamo's house in Arcata. There was a party. The backyard was adorned with lights, candles, and photos of the dead. Mothers, grandfathers, uncles, cousins...old photos of old times. We danced in the kitchen, cheek to cheek, hip to hip. We ate homemade food. We laughed. It was a lovely evening.

Tonight we ate Mexican food in your honor. Yes, we ate Mexican food in Kosovo. Despite the thousands of miles between the two countries, the food was remarkably acceptable and passed for better than the bad Mexican food in New York City or on Giuntoli Lane. Yes, it was better than that.

We ate in your honor, and also laid out cigarettes for Richard's grandfather and my dad. The conversation went in many directions. My two, heavy-handed margaritas got me talking dirty, as to be expected, so Day of the Dead became Day of the Dead, and sex. We talked. We shared stories. We didn't know what to leave for the girl who was vaginally fisted by a friend who was only to die just a few months later by the hands of her drug dealer. No, we didn't know what to leave for her. So we left random things- a button, a business card, a wooden bead...

People die, huh? Maybe someday you'll tell me all about it. In the meantime, I'll have this- my thoughts mingling with the thoughts of others on the subject of loss and living. I'll have my margaritas dedicated to you. I"ll have my memory, despite its unreliability. I'll have something that, although cannot replace you, will allow me to move on. What is it? I don't know. Something that grows stronger with your absence. It's the thing that prevents me from jumping off a bridge, or jumping in front of a subway train. Maybe it's a gift from you. Maybe.